Facebook

Last Saturday I made the decision to deactivate my facebook account and stay away from that forum for awhile. There were many reasons for this decision, but the main reason was that I was venting my anger on a public forum, which made a lot of people uncomfortable, not to mention what it was doing to my own comfort level.

I have made many posts about anger, and how destructive it can be. My therapist and I are digging pretty deep into my psyche to find the true source of the anger, and ways to deal with it more constructively. Writing helps, but I am not prolific, and I cannot simply write on demand. But it will take a lot more than just writing to deal with this problem.

To be perfectly honest, at my age anger shouldn’t be such a big issue anymore, but I have talked to many people on facebook and several support groups who are filled with rage because of what they went through as kids. This is not how I want to live my life, so I continue digging deep inside myself with the help of my therapist to get to the root of it all, and hopefully find a way to let it go.

Anger is a cancer that consumes you, and roils deep in your psyche until everything goes black and all that you can think about is doing damage to yourself and others. Even though I am aware of when I have these moments of darkness, there is nothing I can do to stop them, except to try to keep them under control and not lash out.

Wish me luck on my quest to vanquish such self-destructive rage. Acknowledging it is the first step in dealing with it, but I have known about it for years and years, yet I have never been able to control it very effectively. Maybe now I will be able to see inside myself with the help of my therapist, deal with the pain that is causing all this anger, and then let it go and be happy.

Life is too short to be so miserable.

Love to all!


James M. Weil